Ah, the early times.  I was born and raised in a small, sleepy town but life was anything but sleepy.  My mother and father divorced when I was 9.  But my life was on a downhill roll even before that.  I was outspoken and rebellious and part of it was due to my home life. The other part of it was inherited.  My father drank too much and my mother tried very hard to hold the family together. All her efforts were to no avail as she also had to work to support my 2 brothers and myself.  I managed to get to high school and my outspoken and rebellious nature led me right into hanging out with some of the more shady characters of our small school.  First came the drinking and then the smoking of marijuana.  And then it dawned on me that I wanted out of school to continue the path I had so bravely chosen for myself.  Somehow, I managed to graduate high school in 3 years. The memories of this are vague as I don't really know how I did this. All I know is that my picture is in the year book as being a 3 year grad student along with 8 other people. Hmmmmmm. Makes one wonder, doesn't it?  I forgot to mention that I come from a family of workaholics which has great bearing on my life.  Having the workaholic genes, I went to work and got an apartment.  My lifestyle kept on in the same direction.....drinking, smoking and partying when I wasn't at work. This went on for a time and then there was one night when I was at a friends apartment. There were several of us there getting loaded and the talk was that we were going to get some Cocaine.  After a small argument that ensued over my participating in this venture, it was finally agreed that I could go.  I cannot put into words how excited I was to do this. This night started a chain of events that I now call my descent into darkness.  

© 2003 Traci